dreampost: even more after dark edition (V)

[wotanon]

[ All betrayal and kissing games make idols thirsty as f—

please list what you're open or not open to somewhere in your toplevel pls and thank ]

Comments

[rollplayinghouse]

...It is. And I am.

[beautifulend]

Mm. I'm glad.

Back to touch, though...I'm told I have a bad sense of boundaries, haha. I don't think I've ever understood there being a "right" or "wrong" time to touch someone, or to be touched. Certain levels of touching are improper to some people in some circumstances, I suppose...but things like holding hands or hugging or petting - those are forms of love that one should always be able to display.

[rollplayinghouse]

...Well, even if they "should" be, they're not comfortable for me to do all the time. I've tried to force myself into it, and it's just not.

So there's definitely a wrong time to touch me, and if you do it you'll regret it.

[beautifulend]

You'd have to try very hard to make me have regrets about anything. But it is nice to learn things like that about someone before it comes to someone feeling like they have to make somebody else regret something.

[ they do reach a hand out toward her head though, slowly. ]

[rollplayinghouse]

[She watches the hand dubiously but doesn't move to stop it in any way.]

If you're trying to fulfill my desires or whatever, shouldn't you regret it already if you make me unhappy?

[beautifulend]

I would feel horrible, of course, and do everything I could to make amends. But that's not regret.

[ they're going to pat her head once, then, leaving it still after that to weave their fingers through her hair. ]

Never in a million years would I think an expression of love is something to be regretted. The only thing that can be done is to understand why it didn't work and to resolve to express it better, next time.

[rollplayinghouse]

...I guess that's fair.

[She just blinks at the pat, but she does go a little tenser at the fingers in her hair.]

But what if you make a mistake with someone that you can't come back from?

[beautifulend]

[ They pull back, and instead just reach for her hand. ]

You mean, if I made someone hate me? That doesn't stop me from loving them. I suppose I'd just be making amends until there's no longer anyone to make amends to.

[rollplayinghouse]

What if they don't want you to make amends? What if you being with them only hurts them? What if it's better for them if you aren't there at all?

[She takes their hand, her grip tight and her voice suddenly almost frantic]

[beautifulend]

[ they cup their other hand over hers, gently rubbing circles with their thumb. ]

Well, first of all - how do you know if all of those things are true? The first is easy enough to figure out, and the second not too much more difficult...but the third - has someone said something like that to you?

[rollplayinghouse]

[Her body is still tense, but at least it doesn't escalate further, her tone flat]

...More or less, yeah. A few different people.

[beautifulend]

If it was truly meant and not a statement of passion, there's not much else you can do than support them from where they can't see. If they can tolerate your presence, even small gestures of benefit every now and again can help soften their edge. By Luna's grace, time and love will heal the rift.

And if it doesn't, it's always better to have carried that love in your heart than it is to have abandoned it and forever wonder what may have been.